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Gift from Hil Part 2 - 2014-12-30
A Gift from Hil - 2014-12-28
There was A LOT of turkey. - 2014-12-04
Can we just jump to January please? - 2014-11-14
A (don't kick the) Bucket List - 2014-10-28

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11:52 a.m. - 2014-05-12
Mother's Day 2014

Not too shabby. The only real ding in my shine was a horribly ouchie back. It's down on my left side near my kidney. Something in that area gets pinched and the pain is simply awful. It's not a throb or an ache or a stab, the pain makes me nauseated with its low but steady message of "Hurts. Hurts. Hurts. Hurts." It's difficult to think past it. Ice helps, as does pressure on the exact spot. The chiro told me my pelvis is oddly tilted and aside from staying limber there's not much can be done except what I'm already doing. Sucks, but what can you do? I count my blessings that for the most part when the pain is bad I don't have to go anywhere.

I soldiered out yesterday though, not about to miss brunch at the club. The table was set up for our exact number so there wasn't an awkward empty chair and extra place-setting, but everyone was missing FIL anyhow. Of course. MIL was very sad and when we took her back to the house and visited for a while she broke down and cried and cried. Because she's in such pain she's angry and snappish too. About half the time whatever you say to her will net you a snarl and a nasty retort. She pinned my ears back several times. Mick was upset, nobody is allowed to give me grief not even his mother. I told him it was fine. She's lashing out, that's all. To take offense at MIL's swipes would be as silly as being upset with an animal that bites you when its foot is caught in a trap. He'd been much the same in the immediate aftermath of his father's death and worse during his last illness before. She'll be less bitey eventually. In the meantime he wasn't to fret, I'm tougher than he thinks. At least about stuff like this. MIL's nastiness has reason, it's the random ugly shit and deliberate dishing pain for its amusement value that I don't understand.

Anyhoodle Mother's Day for me was terrific. I opted out of hose and heels and went to brunch in sandals and an ankle-length hippie skirt. Comfy and stylish. Escorted by my two handsome dudes in khaki and collared shirts. The food was great, the setting always makes me laugh (undiluted white people are a hoot to watch), and though they contributed to the table talk properly it was a pleasure to see Wolf and Jon nudge each other and snort over private jokes, leaning in to mutter in the other's ear and laugh. It's not anyone's fault but bad timing and circumstance left Wolf without much family. Now he's catching up age-wise and Jon is a nice guy anyhow so this friendship between the step-cousins is totally great. Wolf needed a guy buddy. Especially one like Jon. Smart, easygoing, and safe. Wolf has almost no relationship with his brother glaring as they do over the 'Mom is Satan - Mom is Wonderful' divide so finding a pal in Jon is a godsend. Plans are being made for another trip to Six Flags Great Adventure, only this time as a foursome. Jon is sweet on someone and thinks asking her and a friend to come would be a fun date. Wolf, of course, is demented by the idea. Six Flags and girls? OMG. My ever cool laidback son was practically gibbering.

The loot? Awesome. Somehow my gift opening was put off until late afternoon. At brunch we were discussing how long it will be before NY legalizes marijuana and MIL asked if it was safe enough yet for her to start growing it in her garden. We laughed and agreed it would be an excellent cash crop to bolster her widow's pension. I then told them about a favorite movie of mine 'Saving Grace' where a widow does that very thing. Wolf asked if I had it on dvd and when I said I didn't but sure wished I did he wriggled like a puppy. When I opened my gifts I found out why. There in the pile of goodies was a dvd copy of 'Saving Grace'. How pleased he must have been when I mentioned it at brunch! And how funny that I had. Also from Wolf a new sippy cup for my desk. (Actually a lidded cup with a built-in straw. Keeps the spillage to a minimum. I've drown more than one keyboard.) A copy of 'Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion'. And together with Mick an absolutely gorgeous purse. Providential as the handle on my purse broke off last week and I'd been purse-less ever since. The new bag was a whimsy addition to my wish list- a deep red ostrich skin bag with brown leather handles and gold hardware. Sounds gaudy, but this bag is lovely. It's actually two bags as there's a removable zip-top inner bag that you can clip the shoulder strap to, also red ostrich skin. I refuse to go find the link as I don't remember what it cost and am afraid to find out. In any case this bag will last for decades and I guess at 51 it's time I had an investment bag. I've always made do with cheap-o bags from Payless and flea markets and dopey counterfeit designer bags bought off folding tables in the city. The only other bag of mine with value is the one I got from the company I invested in with a KIVA micro-loan. I love the bag for what it represents, but it's a pain in the patoot to use. A big deep hobo bag made of batik cotton and during the year I carried it I know I spent at least 6 weeks' worth of time rooting around trying to find stuff that had sunk to the bottom. Aggravating. This schmancy new purse of mine has a key ring snap at the top and a phone pocket, plus it's flat-bottomed and not too deep so I'll be able to find things without churning everything around like the balls in a lotto draw tank. The only drawback is that being leather it's kind of weighty but for the pleasure of its looks and ease of use I'm sure I can deal.

From Mick alone was a pair of fluorite studs. Gorgeous sparkly color changing ovals in a silver set. Why is a man I never gave children to giving me Mother' Day presents? Because. Because he never misses an opportunity to make me feel special. Because Wolf is as close to a kid of his own as he'll ever have and he loves Wolf as much as if he were blood kin. Because Mick feels it's his duty to make up for all the shit years and shittier people in my life before him. I've told him many, many times it's not his job and I don't expect this, but he insists on doing it anyway.

Plus there were gift cards and stationery from SIL and MIL and a sweet note from Amy wishing me the joy of the day. Everybody traded "Happy Mother's Day!" wishes on FB. Mother Nature herself got into the spirit and the day was postcard beautiful. Violets and lilacs and dogwood everywhere under a cloudless blue sky. Perfect. Made to order.

Content and grateful, ~LA

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