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9:03 a.m. - 2010-06-01
I'm sticking with the comics in the morning, they make more sense.

Do you ever feel like everyone in the whole world ate a big bowl of stupid for breakfast?

BP ruins the entire ocean, hence the planet and all they've managed so far is, "Um, well that didn't work. Bill, how's that giant band-aid thing coming? Shelly, I kind of like your idea about using oil eating ducks to clean it up, see how many you can scrounge up off eBay. Try Craig's List too, okay?"

Israel. WTF? Seriously. WTF???? France beating the crap out of Greenpeace was stupid, but you guys went mega-super-duper stupid here. Turkey is like the only friend you have and you guys go storming out into international waters and go all Rambo on a bunch of Turkish humanitarian aid workers? This whole starving the Palestinians thing is fricken awful anyhow, self-defeating and a crummy thing to do to a bunch of poor people, I don't care how many rocks they throw.

Africa. All you cruddy little tin pot countries with your warlords and dictators, stop already. Arming 9 year olds with Uzis, raping infants, star-belly Sneetches slaughtering the plain-belly Sneetches for a generation just so the plain-belly Sneetches can return the favor with the next generation, letting your kids die of malaria for want of a mosquito net but whooping it up every night at the local bar, the whole witch thing- they're not witches they're exhausted malnourished women who you've bred and worked into the ground and just want to trade in for an 11 year old 'wife', you're not fooling anyone here.

Speaking of child brides- Pakistan, Afghanistan, Yemen, cut the crap.

Arizona. You guys might want to check with New Mexico and see if they'll be okay with hooking up with Texas too and then we'll cut all y'all loose from the United States and you can have your own arid scorpion-ridden little country down there. You can call it 'Hatefultonia' or 'Bigotstein' and declare your smiting Jesus as President, appoint Joe Arpaio as your minister of justice, and happily give the death penalty to jay walkers and anyone guilty of being darker than Casper the Friendly Ghost. We hope you have a wonderful time. We'll just dig a 50' deep moat, seed a landmine field, and build a nice sturdy wall with gun towers along your northern border to make sure none of you enter the USA illegally and take our jobs and stuff, okay?

I could go on. And on. And on. There's no shortage of stupid, but I'm too depressed to write more.

Sheesh. ~LA

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