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My Profile
Gift from Hil Part 2 - 2014-12-30
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1:31 p.m. - 2012-12-23
Worst. Apocalypse. Ever. Man, what a non-event that one was. I think we're all kind of Doomsday-ed out, don't you? Even the crazy Christians that are always rooting for the Rapture are like, "Meh, the end of the world, whatever. Are the Duggars on tonight?" Speaking of Christians, I met some sane nice ones the other day. No, really! Not that matters of faith came up much, we were too busy laughing, trading dog stories and eating. The neighbors up behind and to the side of us threw a neighborhood meet-n-greet Christmas party. No nefarious conversion agenda, just neighborliness. It was fun. Wolf had a cold and Mick, well Mick isn't much for socializing so I went alone. Finally got to meet most of the folks on our street. When introduced I identified myself as the one with the white house with the peace sign. "Ah!" they'd say, "Your place is so cute! How do you manage in the winter with such a steep driveway?" Mr and Mrs Barky were there, but Mrs Barky's snake hair was under control and she didn't let out any avenging harpy screeches when she saw me. After waking them up last week to alert them that their compost bin was on fire and that the wicked whipping wind was about to set the entire block ablaze she's been especially cold and sniffy. Mrs Barky has always been a jerk, but being found in contempt of noise laws, getting a citation for abusing her dog and being officially admonished for being a Bad Person, and creating a menace with her unchecked compost bin fire she's been no big fan of mine. Tough noogs, you wretched fire-causing dog abusing bad neighbor. Oh, and thanks for asking how Princess was since she was caught in your illegal groundhog trap...NOT! Gads, what a twat. Anyhoodle... The hosts of our neighborhood get-together are terrifically nice. YAY! I've been hoping to get to meet some neighbors who actually know the meaning of the word. I don't need Flintstone and Rubble, just some folks nearby to say hello to and perhaps have a barbeque with every once in a while. To say nothing of having a safe house for Wolf to go to if something goes down while Mick and I are out. The nice neighbors seem to fit the bill perfectly despite their obvious churchy thing. The two younger kids (boys) go to the local Christian school but the elder two (girls) go to Wolf's school. Why my dippy kid has never spoken to them is a mystery, they get on the bus at the stop next to his. When I asked him about this later he shrugged and said he was used to keeping to himself on the bus. Wolf code for: "I'm too shy to talk to strange girls and besides I'm dinking with my phone the whole time." I encouraged him to just speak to them and he muttered something about how his dating life was his own biz. I snorted and told him I wasn't talking about dating. For one thing I doubt they're allowed to date, and certainly not a heathen like him in any case, but making friends? Friends are good. Winter break is in full swing. On day #1 Mick slept in and then spent the day putzing around and saying how relieved he was he wouldn't have to see Uber-Sports school's campus until 2013. Wolf spent yesterday and into this morning at his aunt's house. The ex-SIL occasionally puts Wolf in a bad place with nasty comments about me, but mostly my kid has a good time when he's down there. I gather the long drive with his father is a bit tense, Wolf's not a fan of his Dad, but hanging with his grown-up cousins and playing with the ex-SIL's dog is fun. Speaking of dogs, Princess was lamed up again. Her sheltie half got the better of her spindly Pomeranian legs. That dog will not give up her love of herding. Herding what? Don't know. I think she herds imaginary sheep. Princess goes outside and tear-asses around the circumference of the yard drawing a tighter and tighter circle 'herding' her invisible sheep until she's satisfied. Big fun for her sheltie self, bad mojo for her little twiggy legs and easily inflamed Pom hips. Plus she's getting older (aren't we all?) and I'm thinking her diet of dry kibble doesn't have enough protein so we've started feeding her canned food once a day. Mick fills her bowl and then puts it and Princess out on the enclosed front porch so she can dine in solitary splendor unmolested by greedy piggy cats. Too soon to tell if it'll help her spindly legs and bad hips, but it does my heart good to see her snarfling up the Alpo. Four animals and three humans in a six-room house makes for some interesting dynamics at times. Princess is an only dog. She gets on with the cats okay, but she is a dog. The cats rampage, claw, snooze, have dibs on the food and water dishes, and except for their slavish devotion to Wolf the cat whisperer they have no need for the humans except as providers of clean litter and as food dish fillers. Princess, however, needs attention and praise from us or she gets all droopy and sad. I've never known a dog who loves being groomed as much as she does. Brushing puts her into orbit. Her eyes roll up in her head, she croons, she'll let you brush her until your arm falls off and then she'll nudge you to keep going with your other one. She even holds still for baths and toenail clipping. This I understand. My own need for physical affection is immense. Once I find someone who puts hands on me without pain? I am so there. So for poor Princess who had as bad a puppyhood as I did childhood the ultimate pleasure is someone who touches her with kindness and care. Yet we are a house of 'only ones' in other ways. I am the only female. Female person anyhow. Mick is the only athlete. Wolf is the only teenager. Within our little family there are pairs and alliances that form and break up all the time. When Mick suits up to go to the gym or for a bike ride Wolf and I give him a thumb's up but also share a sly wink and nudge. "You go, dude, we'll be here in the nice comfy house." When I get wiggy with the hormones or wax rhapsodic about eyeliner and such my guys club together and turn patient faces to me but I know they're knocking ankles under the table and secretly rolling their eyes. "Oh boy, she's at it again." When Wolf is being obtuse and snarkily 15 or going on and on about YouTubes, the hassles at school, and video games Mick and I cut our eyes at each other. "Thank goodness we're grown-ups and this crap is in the past!" Each is entitled to his/her own and nobody mocks out loud. We love each other too much for that. We respect our differences but also find comfort in our pairings. Comrades of understanding. The pets do this too. Cats vs the dog. The old cats vs the spaztastic kitten. Attention whores vs the aloof ones. Standing quietly in the dining room looking into the living room and watching all four of the pets jockey for position next to and on top of their beloved boy always makes me smile. Wolf is no Saint Francis of Assisi, if anyone is out in the yard charming and talking to the wild things it's me, but with the house pets Wolf is Da Man! Wolf is the cool two-legged one who has the power to open doors and scoop extra rations from the kibble bin. "You rock, dude! You with your opposable thumbs!" Got my tickets to see Eddie Izzard. Thanks to Steph's hocking me to get off my duff. I tried Ticketmaster first thing Friday when the tix went on sale and the site was down. So I let it go until Steph noodged me yesterday. Crap! The tickets were almost gone! I got two, the seats aren't together but this is okay. We might be able to trade once we're there. If nothing else Mick and I will be at the same show and afterward we can swap stories and repeat lines to each other and laugh. We're seated near enough to each other that Mick will be able to see me a few rows ahead. Anyway sitting on my own I won't feel obligated to translate Eddie's Brit English or feel I have to apologize and make it up to him (Mick) when Eddie is rambling and stalling the way he does. I can just sit back and glory in being there and seeing one of my favorite performers live. And Mick will be more than satisfied because he made sure I was there. This will be one birthday treat that wasn't screwed over by circumstance or the selfishness of others! No secret that my birthdays have mostly sucked. Bad weather, no money, uncaring parents and spouses, Alex's birthday falling so close and it was my choice to let his birthday always overshadow mine, my supposedly 'special' day carries more scars than smiles. Not only my birthday, but every day for the first 44 years really. My Mick has made it his life's mission to make up for and give me every single thing I was cheated out of and missed during the Bad Years. I swear to you Mick has never seen 'The Princess Bride', but "As you wish" is his life's motto. Took a while to believe it but...
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