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10:27 a.m. - 2011-04-13
Why fuss? Why not?

Thanks for all the input, guys! I will most likely end up doing the lasagna. It's difficult for me to shake that Rockwellian mental picture of a holiday meal being a shiny happy multi-generational family gathered around a table drooling over a whacking hunk of roasted animal though. Rockwell never painted lasagna.

Last night I was discussing the menu with Mick and he asked why I was fussing at all, it's just us. The folks come over often enough anyhow so their being here isn't out of the ordinary. I thought on it for a bit and said making a deal of the holidays is important to me for a few reasons.

One, what will Wolf remember when he is grown up? I thought about how someday he'll be sharing his childhood memories with his wife and what would he say? "Holidays? Nah. No biggie at our house. No special things or traditions." The idea that he'd have nothing to remember or pass on hurt more than I imagined it could. No, I don't want him to remember gruesome starchy horribly formal holidays where his nerve-wracked mother was a shrieking mess trying to make everything 'just so' and sucked the fun and joy out of everything like my childhood holidays. But surely there's a middle ground between grim formality and utter slackitude.

Two, as I learned with the wedding that never was, if I don't stick to my guns and insist on it then special occasions NEVER happen. How bad does it suck that my junior prom was the last time I'll ever wear a floor length dress and dance with a guy in a tux? Sure, nobody will wear a gown or a morning coat to Easter dinner, but jeeze, why not get the house and ourselves spiffied up a little a few times a year? Why not make the effort to have things nice once in a while? Otherwise I might as well chuck out my china and the good glasses and we can just slob around eating out the Tupperware forever.

Three, as Ferris said, 'Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.' Time is so goddamn slippery. Making a deal of the holidays is my way of catching Life in the act. Grabbing it and making it hold still for a bit and being here. I don't want to look up from my keyboard someday and go, "Wait, what? It's 2016??? When did this happen? Where'd the time go? What the hell have I been doing? Nothing?"

Even Mick, who hates holidays like horses hate snakes, had to agree I have a point.

So here at Casa Sage we will put on clean shirts, gather around the nicely set table and share a ceremonial lasagna and it'll be all kinds of fine.


Much love, ~LA

7 Wanna talk about it!

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