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8:35 p.m. - 2010-08-08
On a too quiet house...

Sometimes the future comes in so big, so clearly.

Wolf is spending the day with his father, doing the shopping for their trip out west (Yellowstone, Glacier National, eastern Washington to great-grandma's place) and though I knew he wasn't any farther away than Malltown I needed to hear my son's voice. My phone rang.

"Mom? It's so weird! My phone was in my pocket and it speed dialed you! I didn't mean to call you, it was just my phone."

Yeah, I know, it was just your phone. You didn't need to speak to me. Didn't want to talk to me. You're with your dad, I know. But I needed to speak to you, hear your voice, hear you say, "Mom".

It's okay, kid. You'll grow up and away. You'll leave. Like your dad. Like your brother. It's okay.

The future. So big, so clear.

'Instant availability without continuous presence is probably the best role a mother can play.'
~Lotte Bailyn

'Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They came through you but not from you and though they are with you yet they belong not to you.'
~Kahlil Gibran

'It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't.' ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

'The hardest part of raising a child is teaching them to ride bicycles. A shaky child on a bicycle for the first time needs both support and freedom. The realization that this is what the child will always need can hit hard.'
~Sloan Wilson

'In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck - and, of course, courage.'
~Bill Cosby, Fatherhood

'Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.'
~Elizabeth Stone

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