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8:35 a.m. - 2010-03-19
No bouquet.

I've been struggling for weeks trying to find a good way to say this. At least one that if it doesn't make sense, it won't set off a bunch of difficult to answer questions and a firestorm of loving concern. The former would be impossible to discuss in the venue and the latter being something I'd appreciate in the abstract but would be unable to cope with, I'm too shaky as it is.

I didn't say anything back in November when it went down because at that time I truly believed there would be the 'real' one in May and I didn't want any of my friends to think they were coming to a used wedding. I'd looked at that thing in November as simply a paperwork procedure, one that would get me and Wolf on the health insurance sooner and help with 2009's taxes. It did. But it is also going to have to serve as the only wedding. The party in May is off. No cake. No flowers. No music. Nada.

Circumstances change. Relationships change. And it's all really too painful and upsetting to talk about. Let's just say I'm looking at things very differently now and leave it at that. Okay?

I apologize if anyone had bent their plans for that weekend. I certainly hope no one turned down anything important or fun because you thought you'd be coming here. This is also why I feel compelled to finally say something now. Before anymore time goes by and any other opportunities are lost.

I am so sorry. I honestly believed things would be different this time, you know?

Anyway, the deed's been done and that's all there's going to be. So a bunch of yadda about what happened and why the pretty wedding is off will just be awful for me. I appreciate you guys so much and I know I can count on you to be respectful about this.


Thanks, ~LA

21 Wanna talk about it!

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