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My Profile
Retro-retrospection - 2008-10-06
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2:22 a.m. - 2005-05-30
'I haven't got time for the pain.'- Carly Simon This morning I woke up with the poison ivy I didn't get last time. Gardening was out. No way was I going out in the sun. One of the worst days of my life was 5th grade field day. I was covered with poison ivy. My teacher that year was a sadistic bastard. He was forever giving out to me. Telling me I was a big baby. Telling me my emotions were out of whack with my physical appearance. Hey dude, so what that I was 5'3" and a 36C? I was still only 11 years old. To add to it, he knew my mother. He knew what it was like at my house. Shit, everybody knew everybody's business, the whole fricken town had less than 1,000 people. And that's if you included the farms outside the village line. So I was welted with oozing blisters and this creep made me sit in the sun. When I asked to move into the shade of the building he told me to grow up and stop being such a goddamn baby. It was the first time I ever heard a teacher swear. I retrospect it might have been he was trying to tell me to take charge of myself and not beg permission to do such obvious things. But back then I had no power. I believed he was telling me to suck it up, I was being a wimp to complain. So there I sat. Broiling. And weeping. Until the school nurse passed by. She hustled me into the shade and asked why I'd been out there like that. I told her the teacher hadn't let me move. She marched away and I saw her speaking to Mr Creep. It didn't look like she was congratulating him on his wonderfully compassionate teaching methods. I've gone to ground when I get rashy ever since. Strictly an indoor pet. If LA got de ivy, LA stay out de sun. My muscles were also lamed up. I wanted to stay in my chair and muck around with my Sims all day. I've gotten to a fun place. Most of the kids are ready to age up into teenagers. I haven't installed the expansion pack yet, but this is the maiden generation to go to Sim U. I've been laying the groundwork by making sure they can do things like cook and study well. And they're all friends. I'm trying to let my Sims be more social and less focused on gaining skill pips. My college kids will have buddies from the get-go. I am a benevolent and caring Sim goddess. My poor freshmen shouldn't be lonely. Somehow despite the screaming muscles and the lure of my game I found in it me to move. I was busy all day, but the killer was stripping the kitchen floor. Until then I'd been pleased that I'd worked off a lot of the soreness. Uh huh. Hey, 'Too Far' is my middle name! I done did myself a damage. I'm going to get back into shape if it kills me. Har dee har har. You will be relieved to know I plan on neither gardening nor cleaning tomorrow. Wolf needs a desk. We're going to IKEA. That's right, I'm going to drag my aching ass to a 50,000sqft store and walk it from end to end. Miles of Swedish bargains for the plucking with my shaking hands. Tuesday my rash should be better. I'll be able to go out. I'm thinking of mowing the lawn. One blade at a time with cuticle scissors. Sick. Sick. Sick. ~LA
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